First day as an instructor
I taught my very own class for the first time ever today.
And I scared the crap out of them.
No, seriously. I was the death-bringing instructor from the bowels of Hell.
The best part is that I didn't even realize this, as they actually responded to questions when I asked them and a few even came up to me to talk to me once the class was done.
I started out by just standing in front of the room with my arms crossed and stared them down until every last one of them (all 130) were quiet. Yes, I silenced an entire room by just standing there and looking authoritative. It's an old psychologist trick. And it really, really worked. I even heard one of the students say to me, "WOW... how did you DO that?" I just smiled at him.
And then started to talk.
That's when they got scared.
My office mate was passing out syllabi for me, and she couldn't help but chuckle a little, because, according to her, "When you project your voice, you sound very, very angry."
And I did.
And they listened.
Oh, did they listen.
In the teaching textbook they gave us, they advise new instructors that it is easier to "lighten up" than it is to "tighten up" during the semester. So I decided to bring the hammer down now, then loosen up as the semester moved along. So I dropped the hammer. I drilled my exam policy into their heads with near violent force ("If you do not notify me within 24 hours of missing an exam, you will not be allowed to retake it and you WILL get a zero!) and even used a few visual aids (when I was telling them what would happen if I ever caught them cheating, I tore the syllabus I was holding in half, told them that would be the first thing they would hear, and they would then get a zero after being asked in a not-so-polite manner to leave the class - no exceptions).
The funny thing is that I actually feel a little bad for them. Could it be that now that I have the ability to actually destroy a room full of fragile young minds, I feel pitty? Compassion? A desire to use well the sacred trust I have been given as their instructor?
Nah. On Wednesday, I'm going to make them stand up and repeat things in unison. I think that will be fun. ;)
And I scared the crap out of them.
No, seriously. I was the death-bringing instructor from the bowels of Hell.
The best part is that I didn't even realize this, as they actually responded to questions when I asked them and a few even came up to me to talk to me once the class was done.
I started out by just standing in front of the room with my arms crossed and stared them down until every last one of them (all 130) were quiet. Yes, I silenced an entire room by just standing there and looking authoritative. It's an old psychologist trick. And it really, really worked. I even heard one of the students say to me, "WOW... how did you DO that?" I just smiled at him.
And then started to talk.
That's when they got scared.
My office mate was passing out syllabi for me, and she couldn't help but chuckle a little, because, according to her, "When you project your voice, you sound very, very angry."
And I did.
And they listened.
Oh, did they listen.
In the teaching textbook they gave us, they advise new instructors that it is easier to "lighten up" than it is to "tighten up" during the semester. So I decided to bring the hammer down now, then loosen up as the semester moved along. So I dropped the hammer. I drilled my exam policy into their heads with near violent force ("If you do not notify me within 24 hours of missing an exam, you will not be allowed to retake it and you WILL get a zero!) and even used a few visual aids (when I was telling them what would happen if I ever caught them cheating, I tore the syllabus I was holding in half, told them that would be the first thing they would hear, and they would then get a zero after being asked in a not-so-polite manner to leave the class - no exceptions).
The funny thing is that I actually feel a little bad for them. Could it be that now that I have the ability to actually destroy a room full of fragile young minds, I feel pitty? Compassion? A desire to use well the sacred trust I have been given as their instructor?
Nah. On Wednesday, I'm going to make them stand up and repeat things in unison. I think that will be fun. ;)
posted by Raoul The Destroyer at 8:59 PM
10 Comments:
Hilarious!! I'm still laughing! I may have wet my pants if I'd been a student in your class! :)
Ah, my son. We have trained you well.
Mom, AKA Wicked Witch of the West
LMAO!! So how did today go? Oooh, details details!!! I soooo want to come to one of your classes, haha! I wonder how many poor souls dropped out of sheer fright.
Oh my.... Why can I SOOOO see you doing that? I'm pretty sure I'd be peeing my pants if I were one of your students. I'm so glad you were my roommate and not my professor.
I'll probably have to start praying for your students soon.
Oh oh and take picture of you class being freaked out next time.
Sweet & nice Lisa taught you to do that? Maybe the deer wasn't accidental ? D
Dad - no, that wasn't Lisa who taught us how to do that... that was a combination of the techniques that my undergrad and grad instructors used that were effective and what I was taught in the "how to teach" class they make the Psych Grad instructors take before they're allowed to teach.
LoL.
Pobrecitos ;)
Hi, I don't know you, I read your post through scoville.
Let's just hope your students don't find this blog!
drvono - that is the reason I try to keep the blog anonymous. That way I can write what I want to about class/students/etc. The instant this blog is no longer anonymous, posts of this nature will disappear.
Dude, my wife told me one time that you scared the crap out of her when she first met you. I'm pretty sure you didn't even try so I can just image how those poor students of yours feel. ;) I bet the ones that survive the semester think you are the best teacher they ever had though.
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